1. When a card just isn't enough...
Has your lady been bugging you for a shitzipoo puppy? Well if you can't afford a $2000 genetically engineered crossbreed, you can still tell her "I love you" with fake dog crap. When she wakes up and finds this message of poo waiting for her on the floor, maybe she'll rethink about getting that dog.
2. Spice up the bedroom
Victoria's Secrets? Please, that is soooooo last decade. Nothing says sexy like a full coverage footie pajama from Pajamagram. Velour is the newest afrodisiac. Bonus: it comes with a hoodie!
3. For the jealous type...
If you've been having trust issues in your relationship, technology has the cure: the modern day chastity belt! This full lingerie set comes with a negligee, panty, and GPS tracking system. She'll love that you'll stop badgering her with accusations, and all you need is a smartphone or laptop to keep track of your woman 24/7.
